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It
Had To Be Usby Harry and Elizabeth Lawrence
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Divorced and estranged for nearly two decades, Harry and Elizabeth Lawrence accidentally met again and were shot with Cupid's arrow when they rediscovered their lost love.
In It Had To Be Us, Harry and Elizabeth share their passions and feelings about the poignant events that brought them back together. Filled with emotion, suspense, humor, and a surprising Las Vegas adventure, this heartfelt true story proves genuine love can survive any of life's journeys.
Book reviewer Marilyn Forstot (author of Sunshine
Riches) calls It Had To Be Us
"a superbly crafted real life story that renews a person's faith in love." And jai clare, guest editor for Zoetrope's online supplement to
All-Story Magazine, says this romantic memoir is
"a strong story that's upbeat without being sentimental --- a rare thing."
Don't let the slender size of this novelette fool you. It Had to Be Us is a remarkable true-life account about Harry and Elizabeth Lawrence, their twenty-year estrangement and the steps they took to rekindle their love. For such a slender novelette, it packs quite the wallop.
Love is worth fighting for -- and Harry and Elizabeth's fighting spirit is worth emulating. It Had to Be Us is a poignant affirmation that happily-ever-after isn't just a storybook ending. I encourage readers to pick up this novelette and learn from its example, to live, love and laugh with your sweetheart and never, ever give up hope. Words can be a tonic for the soul. Use them wisely. Reviewed by C.L. Jeffries (Romance Fiction)
If you haven't read it, do so. It will warm your heart and show you that love can heal all wounds. It also gave me hope that true love DOES exist, contrary to what others will have you believe. ~ Wolf's Picks
Sitting across the aisle from one another in a World History class, high school juniors Harry and Elizabeth showed more interest in each other than in learning about social studies. Harry liked Elizabeth's smile. She was captivated by his offbeat sense of humor, even when it got her in trouble for laughing out loud in class. After developing a strong friendship, the two began dating, fell in love, and were married a year after graduation.
During their 24 years of marriage, Harry
and Elizabeth raised two children
– John and Claire. Harry worked as an
engineer. Elizabeth became a college
administrator. Unfortunately, the years took their
toll. Harry began to spend most of his spare time
handicapping and betting on greyhound races.
Elizabeth devoted more and more hours to her job.
Suffering from alcoholism, she finally admitted
herself to a rehab program – which started her
on the road to recovery. Alienated from each
other, Harry and Elizabeth went through a painful
divorce.
Later, Elizabeth moved to California with
her second husband. Harry, who also married
someone else, remained in Colorado. In a strange
coincidence, both of their new spouses died of
leukemia. Then, on a Christmas Day, almost two
decades after separating, Harry and Elizabeth met
again and began a journey of rediscovery. In
writing It
Had To Be Us, Harry uses the present tense,
Elizabeth the past tense. (If men are from Mars
and women are from Venus, a slight difference in
time orientation should be expected!)
Relating a true love story in this
heartfelt memoir, Harry and Elizabeth recall the
romantic, humorous, and poignant events of their
remarkable journey.
CHAPTER
ONE
Our
Second Beginning
HARRY
REMEMBERS:
Because it’s Christmas, I must go to my
daughter’s house even though Elizabeth will be
there. Almost nineteen years since we parted. The
two years of our courtship and the twenty-four
years of our marriage are still so vivid in my
memories. The love and passion we shared for most
of those years will always be with me. Her dreams
were my dreams because of my love for her.
When the dreams began to fade at the end of
our marriage (for reasons I could not or would not
understand), we parted. I loved her so and wished
for her someone better than me. When she did find
somebody else, I fell into a deep depression. I
told our children never to tell me anything about
her, and they respected my wishes.
At our daughter's house, Elizabeth
doesn’t look well. She tells me she is working
12 to 14 hours a day and has advanced in her
academic career. I feel some satisfaction in
having helped her obtain an education that
qualifies her for this kind of success. Still, I
show my frustration by replying sarcastically,
“So, what’s new?” I see she is taken back by
my remark because of the reminder of one of our
problems. I wish I hadn’t said that. I never
want to hurt her again. Oh, sure, she is so
concerned about the family. Her words do not
seem true to me. Obviously, her career and persona
are still the most important things in her life.
On my way home, I can’t stop thinking of
her and the way we were. The pain of seeing her
again is devastating.
ELIZABETH
REMEMBERS:
Claire told me she asked her Dad to come
over on Christmas morning. She wondered if I would
mind, since I planned to stay all night at her
house on Christmas Eve. I said, “No, not at
all.” But the same old anxiety came over me
anyway. What would Harry think of me after all
these years? What would we talk about? Would I get
a hug? (Not necessarily in that order.)
I got up at the ridiculous hour of 4 a.m.
to dress and put on make-up so I wouldn’t look
so bad when he arrived. He showed up around 8:30
in the morning. “Hi, how are you?” he asked,
followed by “What are you doing now?”
I explained I was working long hours each
day at my new job as a college vice president
–to which he replied, “Oh, just like you
always did.” That hurt! But it gave me something
to think about.
While I was alone in the kitchen a short
time before he left, Harry came into the room and
said, “Never forget, Elizabeth, you’re a
survivor.” Because he seemed so caring and dear
at that moment, I knew he regretted his earlier
harsh comment. I just had to hug him – and that
one embrace warmed my heart as nothing had for
nineteen long years. I couldn’t help remembering
our good times together. I thought about how much
I loved being close to him and about the tears I
shed when he left me. During one of our last
conversations before we parted, I remember telling
him if I thought we would never make love again, I
would die.
To be honest with myself, I couldn’t
forget the bad times either. I recalled the night
I admitted myself to an alcoholism treatment
facility. Ironically, it was on St. Patrick’s
Day (not exactly the way I usually celebrated one
of my favorite holidays!). Harry had gone to the
dog races. He refused to participate in the
program with me, claiming he couldn’t “get in
touch with” his feelings. This devastated me. I
knew he was a co-dependent and needed help too. It
also reinforced my low opinion of myself because
of my drinking, weight gain, and what I thought
was the loss of Harry’s love. I felt so alone.
After the divorce, I was vulnerable and married again too quickly – and on the rebound. I know now this was not fair because I still had such strong feelings for Harry. However, my excessive guilt motivated me to try to make the best of a bad situation. I went into a kind of trance-like existence in which I was easily manipulated. I repressed so much in order to survive.
HARRY
REMEMBERS:
I hear from Elizabeth in March in a card
expressing sympathy about the death of my mother
who passed away in February. Because it’s
signed, “Regards, Elizabeth,” I feel hurt by
such coldness. My love for this woman has
destroyed all my relationships with others these
many years, so I harbor a deep resentment that she
can go on as if nothing had happened in the years
we were together. Oh, well, I have a good life. I
play golf with my friends every day, watch
television every night and have all the money I
need. No problem.
ELIZABETH
REMEMBERS:
Again this year, my daughter told me she
had invited her Dad over for Christmas morning,
and this time I really looked forward to seeing
him. But he didn’t arrive until close to noon.
Did he think I would be gone by then? When he came
in, we were all playing Scrabble. He looked so
good to me, but I was very worried about the
scars on my face (from recent skin cancer surgery)
and how I would look to him. Later, he offered to
take me back to my sister Bridget’s house since
our daughter was busy with Christmas obligations.
While driving to my sister’s, Harry told
me he still thought I was the greatest person and
that he felt I had been a good part of his life.
He even touched my hand at one point. This
surprised and delighted me. He said he hoped I had
no animosity towards him for the past because he
had suffered from “tunnel vision.”
When we arrived at my sister’s place, he
was just going to let me go in alone – but I
said, “You wouldn’t let an opportunity like
this go by, would you? We could cause quite a
scene here.” He agreed immediately, which proved
his great sense of humor was still intact.
We went inside together, much to the
astonishment of everyone. I will be grateful
forever to my brother-in-law for asking Harry a
question I was not brave enough to ask. “Are you
still playing the dogs (greyhounds)?” Harry
answered, “Only a couple of times a year when
Dottie and Will, my sister and brother-in-law,
come to visit.” That answer was the best
Christmas present I could have received. It meant
one of our major problems from the past was no
longer there. It was a Merry Christmas indeed!
HARRY REMEMBERS:
I must go to my daughter’s home for
Christmas, and Elizabeth will be there again. It
will be easier to see her this time. I have
hardened myself against my feelings for her. I
have been so foolish these many years, thinking,
hoping, she might still care for me. She's a widow
now – could there be something between us again?
No way, I tell myself, but no problem!
She looks better than last year. It seems
she has retired and writes movie reviews. I hope
she is happy and taking care of herself. I also
can’t help wondering if she has someone new. No!
I don’t want to know. When she needs a ride to
her sister’s, though hesitant, I volunteer. I
feel the need to say a few things to her in
private. Driving along with Elizabeth, I
experience tender feelings for her as well as a
need to get back at her. “I just want you to
know how much I admired your accomplishments when
we were married,” I tell her. She turns her head
and smiles sweetly, so I continue. "I
remember how we used to love going to movies
together. You must really enjoy writing
reviews.” I want her to realize that at least I
haven’t forgotten our past.
When we arrive at Bridget’s house, we
decide to pretend we are back together again in
order to observe the shocked reactions of her
sister and brother-in-law. It seems to work –
and I feel a closeness with her again. However,
while driving home I reflect that she's given me
no recognition of the good times we shared
together in the past.
ELIZABETH
REMEMBERS:
The next day I wrote Harry a note thanking
him for driving me to my sister’s and for the
nice things he said about me. I also explained
that I had no animosity towards him – only good
feelings. I suggested that we go to dinner or a
movie before I left for California. If he was
interested, I indicated he could call me at our
daughter’s or at my sister’s.
A couple of day’s later, he phoned me,
and we made arrangements to meet on New Year’s
Day. When Bridget asked me, ”What’s all this
with Harry?” I answered, “I don’t really
know.” But I did realize it was impossible to
hide my excitement and nervousness about our date.
HARRY
REMEMBERS:
I receive a letter from Elizabeth a couple
of days after Christmas. She thanked
me for taking her to her sister’s and for the nice things I said to her. It was signed, “Fondly, Elizabeth.” I decide to call about her dinner and movie suggestion, knowing I can come up with an excuse later. But then I think about that “Fondly” she signed to her note. Oh, what the hell, I’ll go.
HARRY
REMEMBERS:
On New Year’s Day we go to dinner at a
small Italian restaurant. She looks so beautiful
across from me. I think to myself, this will be
our last meeting. She will go back to Los Angeles
and marry someone else. Again, I will not have to
see or hear of her anymore. Maybe if she did
remarry, my love for her would finally die.
However, the thought of her being with someone
else again is unbearable.
We discuss our two children and how loving
they are with our grandchildren. We agree the
hectic environment they were raised in has not
affected them severely. Elizabeth reveals to me a
considerable tax problem that she can’t resolve.
At first, I find it hard to understand how a
person with a salary like hers can get into tax
trouble. Then I remember how she used to borrow
secretly from loan companies to pay tuition for
students who couldn’t afford to go to college.
Still up to her old tricks probably.
When we order dinner, I find out she is now
a vegetarian and ask crudely, “Are you in some
kind of California cult?” I get an explanation I
don’t understand. She says something about
“not eating anything that once had a face” and
then talks about various allergic reactions to all
kinds of things. After dinner, we go to a movie.
The comedy Dumb
and Dumber seems very appropriate for our
situation. I want to hold her hand. This was
something we always did during a movie, but I
can’t make the move. It would be like a promise
I couldn’t keep, and worse still, it might be
rejected. Hearing Elizabeth's laughter in the
movie makes me feel so good.
After the movie, I want to take her some
place where we could lie down and I could just
hold her for awhile. Of course, I could not ask
for that.
That night she tells me she plans to leave
on Friday. Her sister will be taking her to La
Junta to catch the train back to Los Angeles. I
think about asking her to let me take her down the
night before so she can avoid the long drive on
her departure day. Of course, my plan is to spend
the night with her. However, I always loved that
aura of innocence in her personality that
manifests itself in her trust of people, so I can
not ask her for what I believe would be a
one-night stand. No problem. After all, my life is
just fine now. I play golf every day with my
friends, watch television, and have all the money
I need.
ELIZABETH REMEMBERS:
After treating the family to a New Year’s
brunch at the Holiday Inn, I went back to
Bridget’s house to rest and get ready for dinner
and a movie with Harry. It was hard to think of
anything else the entire day. Even though I needed
a nap desperately (I had stayed all night at my
daughter’s to celebrate New Year’s Eve), I
couldn’t sleep.
Our dinner was delicious, but Harry seemed
a bit upset over my vegetarianism and allergies.
The movie, Dumb
and Dumber, left a lot to be desired, but it
was such fun to laugh again. I was disappointed
when Harry didn’t hold my hand during the movie,
but afterwards he was very solicitous of my
footing in the snow and took my arm several times
to steady me. It felt good.
On the way back to my sister’s, I
suggested he might like to visit me in California
sometime. I said he could sleep upstairs at my
condo and I would sleep on the couch downstairs.
He shocked me with “I don’t think I like those
sleeping arrangements.” I was speechless! Then
he said, ”Well, I suppose all the romance is
over anyway.” I composed myself a little and
replied, “It’s never too late for romance.”
When we got to the door, I parodied a line
from the movie we had just seen and teased,
“Well, how about a BIG HUG?” He gave me one
and made my day.
ELIZABETH
REMEMBERS:
To my deep disappointment, I hadn’t heard
anything from Harry since our “date” on New
Year’s Day. I decided to call him. I thanked him
for the dinner and said I had a great time. He
admitted he did too and asked me when I was going
back to Los Angeles. I reminded him that my sister
was driving me to La Junta on Friday.
I then re-extended my invitation to him to
visit, but I felt I was being much too aggressive.
I was surprised when he seemed to like the idea.
He said he had to finish his carport and some
paperwork regarding his mother’s estate – then
he would let me know when he could make the trip.
I tried not to appear too excited or to get my
hopes up because I didn’t want to be hurt again.
Still, I couldn’t stop thinking of Harry
all the rest of the time I was in Colorado. When
Bridget asked me if Harry had a girlfriend, I
answered, “I don’t know.” She said, “Why
don’t you ask him?” I replied, ”Because
it’s none of my business.” But I really wanted
to know myself.
HARRY
REMEMBERS:
I receive a letter from Elizabeth thanking
me for the dinner and
movie and inviting me out to Los Angeles
again. She said I could attend some press
screenings with her. The letter was signed,
“Love, Elizabeth.” I interpret the “love”
as a generic form of the word, but I call her
anyway. I lie and say I would love to come out,
but I have a lot of responsibilities for the
senior golf league and can’t set a date at this
time.
In no way would it be possible for me to be
in the same house she shared with someone else in
the past. Knowing I would not go out there, I
decide to tease her. I ask what the living
arrangements would be like.
She says she would sleep downstairs and I could sleep upstairs. “What, no romance?” I exclaim. She tells me anything is possible or something like that. I now have a problem.
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